Thursday, February 28, 2013

Facebook Highlights!!

So, since Facebook has decided to be an asshatter and not show over HALF our posts to you and the fact I post regularly on my personal page rather then posting on my
"Facebook Page"( I need to change that) I thought why not post some highlights here on the Blog! Feel free to like my "Fan Page"!! I have been thinking of doing the FB Highlights for a couple of weeks now and then I notice a few other bloggers started doing a Facebook Friday type post on their blogs, I guess great blogger minds think alike, right?!! LOL I may or may not post weekly, I may or may not post monthly.. Depends on how this post goes! I skipped all the boring stuff like what we had for dinner and personal stuff I don't want certain people to see haha, so don't worry I'll try not to bore you!
Here ya go!

*Dyed my hair finally(Chocolate Brown) and the shower felt amazing ;0)
I was once again slacking(what's new?) and forgot to post some more Katie moments last night! So, we were sitting down doing homework, Katie's folder has the initials'"AM" on the front, so I asked "what does "AM" stand for?" Katie said "it stands for "something memory". So, I'm thinking in my head "great tool to help the kids remember, it totally worked on Katie, haha" and I said "come on what's it stand for?" Katie aggregately busted out with "it stands for work until we die". Stephanie and I busted out laughing so hard I think I peed a little! Then we ran to the store and Katie wanted money for yet ANOTHER LPS, I said "dude, you sure like to spend my money" She then said "yea, cause I like to get things, all kids like toys and candy and stuff".. Yes, Katie yes they do... I couldn't argue with that reasoning, could I? So I didn't and said "NO" Bahahahaha! We just had this "money don't grow on trees" talk the other day, you work, do your chores, home work, ect THEN you get paid at the end of the week(if you're lucky)! ;0)~

*Katie is on my last damn nerve with this making some nasty shit and trying serve it to me thinking she is all funny and shit. She decided to make a sandwich of..... Ketchup(tons of it) 2 slices of cheese and 6 banana peppers(with stems still attached).. She brings it to me all proud of herself(snickering) GUESS WHAT KATIE'S HAVING FOR SUPPER TONIGHT?!!!!
(To many comments for me to take the time to type, all I can say is you should have been there LOL)

*I have about a flucktillion gray hairs on my head and I have had a bottle of hair dye sitting on the dresser for over a week(maybe longer). Slacker I am and knowing I do!
Comments:( I had to share those too!)
SY: Thanks now you got me saying flucking lmao
ME: It's an awesome word, that you can awesomely use while having children.. It really confuses them! Katie is all like "MOM, that's a BAD word" and I'm all like "Nope, get your facts straight you little flucker"!! LMAO ;0)~
ME: Ok, Bad Momma Jomma is off to put together a bike thingy we got today for the littlest flucker LOL I will return
*There's margarita in my freezer, i̶t̶ ̶i̶s̶ ̶t̶o̶o̶ ̶e̶a̶r̶l̶y̶ ̶t̶o̶ ̶s̶t̶a̶r̶t̶ ̶d̶r̶i̶n̶k̶i̶n̶g. I keep hearing my name being whispered from the kitchen. So I whispered back "Soon, my precious, soon". ;0)
Comments:( I had to share those too!)
SY: I want one :)) save me one lol
ME: You coming over? or you at work?
SY: I'm at work. I get off at 8. I might be coming over after work. Idk yet. But ill let you know
ME: OK! ;0)
LO: Is there one with my name on it?
ME: I will write your name on it with a magical pen, if you show up in 15 minutes it's yours if not the ink with magically transform to my name LOL ;0)~~
DE: You're just too damned funny, Sharon; you could be making bank at comedy.
*OK, this TOOTH is getting an eviction notice in the morning!! Yesterday I tried to eat a piece of my sisters evil orange gum balls and a sharp piece stabbed my nerve(i think) I literally wanted to punch the little flucking gum ball in the stupid little orange face(if it had one) now tonight i bit in to a piece of meat which happen to stab my nerve again(i think), so I stabbed the flucker about 50 zillion times with my steak knife and slammed his sorry pain inflicting ass in the yard. Tooth, if you weren't attached to my gums i swear i would take a hammer to your stupid ugly evil self, when i have the dentist remove you I'm gonna keep you and bring you home just to smash you with the hammer!!!!!!!!! Gah.
 Comments:( I had to share those too!)
SY: Lmaolmaolmao lmao
ZL: Nerve of tooth hurting felt worse than ANY labor pain I ever had!
ME: That's what I just told Stacey last night lol
DE: Sharon, you shouldn't limit your writing to your blog; you have great comedic talent.
SS: Lmao look out tooth she's after ya!
ME: Well, Thank you, Dougward! I have been neglecting the poor poor blog lately! I was just thinking the other day about posting all my Facebook statues to my blog as a weekly subject, then i seen a TOP blogger just started doing it this week. So, I was all like fluck this bish is flucking up my day!!! Oh well, it's gonna happen anyways!! ;0)
HubberLover: I'm sorry baby! I really know how you feel!!!! Would rub ur jaw for you if I was home! Love you!!!!! Xoxoxoxo
ME: Thank you, baby! I know you do and it suckssss! I love you too!! xoxox

*Quick Homework break- Katie was munching on some Bacon Bits while we were working on her first page of HW, Gracie comes B-bopping over with a big dorky smile on her face, laughing obnoxiously and Katie yell's "MOM, Gracie has something in her mouth"!!!! I look at her mouth and it's a little brown thingy, so I reached in and grabbed it..... It was a freaking soggy bacon bit lmao!! Instead of Lil'Bit we can now call her Bacon'Bit ;0)~
*Ok, Everything seems better... Man, that was scary. I jumped up, grabbed the diaper bag and started stuffing it with everything I could LOL I was even preparing to grab Gracie throw her in the tub with a mattress over her!! Whew, I need to go back to bed.
*OMG I'm getting SCARED!!!!!!!!!!!!! MOM , LOOK outside!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! We are rocking..........
*All these Asshat refrigerator trolls ,laundry gnomes, carpet creature's and dust demons keeping showing up. BUT, not once does a Brownie Elf show its little hard working self at my house to help out. Shitshanking JERKS!
*I have defeated the bad ass little snarly trolls, the refrigerator has been reclaimed! VICTORY is MINE! ;0)

On to my next battle- Laundry Gnomes, I will reclaimed my cottons/polyesters TODAY!
Comments:(I just had to share those too!)
SS: Lol when u figure out how to defeat and completely rid the laundry trolls let me, know the secret.
LO: Zena, the Warrior Princess, has nothing on Sharon, Queen of the House Cleaners!! Woo Hoo!!
ME: SS, trolls invade the refrigerator. It's gnomes that dirty, spread out and lose the laundry. The war will never end, we just have to keep battling on!!!! ;0)
SS: I'll get my shield
*Gotta clean out the refrigerator, I keep putting it off because I'm SCARED LOL There's a chance creepy little warty trolls with sharp fangy teeth and slimy smelly hands have taken up residency in there. Yes, I know that's what it is. Only they would leave the cap off the milk and spill leftovers without cleaning it up right??? So it must be the trolls!!!! Gah.
*Windows open with the cool breeze flowing through, the sound of rolling thunder and the smell of rain! So relaxing if it stays this way I may get some awesome sleep tonight! This would have been a perfect night to sit on the front porch just talking and drinking coffee with my HubberLover. I love you and miss you so much ♥
*Ok, Wish me LUCK!!! I'm about to embark on a journey I may not return from... The Girls Room... It will be a long and rough journey with blood, sweat and LOTS of tears. Please pray for me!!! Thank you ♥ ;0)~
*Hatching a pair of socks and poking her baby in the eye. #Funnakedbabytimes
*I really should go to bed!! I went to the refrigerator to recap my sweet tea and seen my jar of banana peppers so I was all like "YES, I will have some". I remove the cap and pour the banana pepper juice in my glass of tea..... What the f*%k did I just do?! Gah!
*Katie wanted to Zombiefy herself and WOW she is CREEPY!!!!
*I gave Gracie some banana yogurt bites and she dropped one on the floor, I go to pick it up to trash it and she hurry's up and snatches it out of my hand while screaming at me for touching it and shoves it in her mouth THEN bites down so hard that I couldn't get it out of her mouth!! Whoa Piggy Pie!!!
*MINE!! Cheese cake Heaven ;0)
*Ok, so I HAVE to tell ya'll this real quick! On the way to C-land Katie asked "what would happen if there were not trees"? Scotty said "we would die, cause trees give us air". Katie then says "well, we do have air fresheners"!!!!! Then on the way back Stephanie's wind shield wipers make a loud noise going across the wind shield and Katie pops off with "Mom, REALLY"? I'm like "What"? She's all like "why you gotta fart"? LMAO she really thought I did!!! She is such a trip!
*I just want your heart ♥ HubberLover♥
*Look what my Katie Love brought to me, she said it's from Daddy cause we're inlove!!
*She is growing up way to fast and it's killing this momma!!! I love you beautiful ♥
*Ducky Kisses xxx
*What's your favorite eating utensil? Currently mine is this SPORK!! I mean who doesn't like a good spork?!!! If your eating soup & salad your gold LOL ;0)
*Gracie's first blow out...

Was NOT perty.

I need vodka.

* gave her my old laptop.... will I ever get my daughter back???
*Katie dislikes me so bad right now "Worst Mother she has ever had" LMAO
*Gracie found the cheese cake!!!!!!!
*OMG!! Never a dull moment in this house. As I'm posting about Katie doing the dishes, she gets done and decided to make us a desert... she gets the strawberries out cleans them, slices them up and makes us each a bowl. I start digging in to mine and she bursts out with an evil laugh and I'm like "Dude, this taste gross". She's all like " I poured banana pepper juice on yours"!!!!! Are you kidding me??? You JERK!!!! LMAO
*Papa came out of the bathroom and Katie tried to tale on Scotty for making prank calls BUT papa heard me telling her over and over to do something, he told her well you ain't listening to your Mom sooooo.... She turned around ASKED me if she could do the dishes!!!!! LMAO
*In the middle of dinner which was shockingly silent, Katie pops off with "Have you ever skinny dipped, Mom?" With a mouth full of steak I snickered and said "Nope, I chunky dunk!" To which Katie replied "Oh, Mom that was so inappropriate, by the way what is skinny dipping and chunky dunking?" LMAO This whole convo is inappropriate, ask me again when your 40!!!!!
*NEVER feed your baby and try to eat at the same time no matter how hungry you are!! You may just end up with a mouth full of mechanical soft squash LMAO YUM-O!!!!!!!!
*Ordered Subway.. I'm getting hunger grumps LOL Please Dear Lord Baby Jesus don't let them be stingy with the banana peppers!! TY ;0)
*Geesh. I'm like a wild animal over here, 6 inches devoured working on the other 6 now!!
*Oh my!! The Gracie Monster has learned to climb up the couch onto the arm of the couch and onto the table. I come walking out of the bathroom and she is sitting there smiling ear to ear... Lord HELP me!!!!!
*I want pizza, like extra extra cheese all buttery and garlicy and BAD... VERY BAD!!! And some buffalo wings with ranch dipping sauce and a freezing cold beer!!!! Mmmmmm ;0)))

*Ah... Looking over some emails I had replied to this morning and asked myself if I was drunk??? Then I realized this laptop has auto-correct... LMAO Guess I need to double, triple check my writing before hitting send from now on.... I bet they had a good laugh though ;0)

*This is SOOO our kids LMAO -HubberLover
*Katie said LOOK I'm a Nerdakin!! LOL
*Wow!! My 7 year old LOVES me.... we got some life ins paper work today and she asked me how it works, so I explained a bit of it to her and she says, "OK, so if you die I get 50,000 dollars to bury you?" I said "yes". She then says, "Ha, I'll just bury you outside with the wormies and keep the money"... I then said "JOKES on you, I ain't got no life ins at the moment". Now I'm sitting here listening to her pitch life ins to me and all the reasons why I need it. Shoot, after that comment I think ill keep having life ins a secret!!!!! LMAO
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